debor016

I had the honor of training at an agency in Willimantic, CT last week, and was able to support two new Risking Connection trainers who have recently joined our community. It’s great fun to watch new people grow in their ability to convey the material and new agencies take on the challenge of transforming their practice.   I was struck by an experience I had while dining with my husband at Max Amore in Glastonbury on our way home. My husband ordered a pork chop, and it arrived thin and overdone, not juicy at all. After some debate he decided to tell the waitress that he was not satisfied. Instead of being defensive, she immediately agreed with him and took it back to replace. Then, while the new one was cooking the manager came over and told my husband that he had been right, the chop was overdone and not the way he wanted to serve things in his restaurant. He offered to heat up my ravioli or give me some new ones so I would be eating hot food with my husband. I said it wasn’t n...

I am very proud to be associated with the creation of a Risking Connection adaptation utilizing native Hawaiian values. This was created through a grant given to Child and Family Services in Hawaii. The main creator is Joey McKeagne, MSW, who consulted with various Hawaiian Cultural Experts. these experts attended the training and said that it was already compatible, and gave advice about bridging to Hawaiian concepts and ideas. We did the first training on the current iteration this past week, and it was very well received. One way of integrating Hawaiian values is through proverbs. I will share some of them here:   "Moha la i ka wai ka maka o ka pua." Unfolded by the water are the faces of the flower… ~’Olelo No’eau   Explanation: Flowers thrive where there is water, as thriving people are found where living conditions are good…. After break we will discuss this concept in more detail using the trauma framework. We will begin to discover how we are impacted by trauma in ou...

I am leaving tomorrow for Hawaii. I will be working there with Child and Family Service. It is an exciting visit because we have created the first draft of an adaptation of Risking Connection using native Hawaiian values. CFS received a grant to consult local Hawaiian cultural experts and map the training to traditional methods and values. I have also transposed these adaptations to the curriculum for foster parents. So while I am there I will be co-teaching an RC Basic, teaching some CFS trainers to become foster parent trainers, teaching group home staff about the Restorative Approach, and doing a Recertification of CFS trainers. I am also looking forward to connecting with old friend Howard Garval and new friend Leslie Slavin. The following week I will be back in Connecticut teaching an RC Basic with some co-trainers from the ACCESS agency in Willimantic. After that I am departing for a complex trip. First I will travel to Milwaukee, Wisconsin where I will do a Recertification of tr...

When I first created the Restorative Approach I was steeped in the world of rewards and punishments. My agency at that time used an elaborate system of points, levels, rewards and consequences… as many agencies still do. I heard then, and still hear now, that we can’t just let these kids “get away with” these behaviors. How will they ever learn if they do not experience some kind of punishment when they hurt another person or destroy property?   It was in this climate that I created the concept of learning tasks. I have proposed that we respond to behavior that hurts other by requiring two kinds of tasks, making amends and learning tasks. Making amends are ways for the child to fix what he broke, repair relationships that have been damaged by his actions. Learning tasks are things that would help the child learn skills that will make it more possible for him to respond differently in the future.   I have worked with many examples of this approach as I consult with many agencie...